Intelligence

I've given in. I've become Sherlocked.

It wasn’t entirely my fault. Pinterest and my friends kept giving me perfectly logical reasons for doing so, and no one gave me a good reason not to, besides the unlikely one that my heart would be ripped out and I would be left to die on the floor. (Although, now that I have watched the last episode, I find this very nearly true.)

But Mr. Sherlock Holmes has got me thinking. He always does. I have no illusions about my powers of deduction – they’re pretty weak. But when I started reading the stories and watching the series, I would always wonder what he would see if he met me, came to our house. What he would be able to read in us that others never see.

I imagine him darting round my room, possibly studying my lifeless body crosswise across my wrinkled bedcovers with his neat little collapsible magnifying glass, looking very tall in his long black coat under our short ceilings. He’d straighten up and turn to John Watson, who’d be waiting patiently or not-so-patiently in the doorway for an explanation. “Clearly, a young writer.”

“But – how do you know that?”

Sherlock would turn back to my room, pointing his long fingers at various objects as he grudgingly clarifies things. “Dust on the shelves, the books, but not on the laptop, suggesting frequent use by a forgetful or distractible person. A large collection of music on CDs as well. An enthusiast, maybe, but there’s dust on those too; she migrated to digital music soon after the purchase of her laptop. Likewise with the notebooks. They’re well-used but dusty. From the fingerprints on the mirror – two or three younger siblings, one of whom she shared the room with. Once a horse enthusiast but she grew out of that, since most of those books are gone except her very favorites, which are on the top shelf, not easily accessible but still there to admire, but that's irrelevant. From her sedentary lifestyle, the contents of her laptop and the callus just in front of the first knuckle on her right middle finger, she’s a writer.”

In a way this relates to our characters. We always see things in them that the readers never will – little flaws that aren’t visible, pieces of backstory that aren’t really important. But Sherlock got me thinking about my characters in a different way.

As a character, Sherlock is pretty much the epitome of the trait of intelligence. He blows us away with the pure power of his brain. He’s insulted when people around him cannot see – pardon me, observe – the details his mind takes in and intersects so easily.

This is not a post about a fandom, nor about the subject of the fandom. This is a post about intelligence.

in·tel·li·gence

noun
1.capacity for learning, reasoning, understanding, and similar forms of mental activity; aptitude in grasping truths, relationships, facts, meanings, etc.

I was reading a post on Holy Worlds about allowing for stupidity, particularly within the field of military operations. The example the author made was one where a group of soldiers was set to march at a certain time, but decided to go earlier instead. It ruined a lot of stuff. The point she made – that we should make our characters human enough to blunder and spoil things out of stupidity or ignorance – stuck with me, combined with the opposite example of Sherlock, who uses his intelligence to fix things (well, usually.) This led to several points I thought it would be prudent to make about intelligence.

1. Intelligence is relative.

My dad is pretty much a genius. As a civil engineer, he daily processes things I can only imagine – advanced geometry, mathematical gymnastics, laws and ordinances and all the little things that make street plans work. But he’ll look at me playing the piano, shake his head, and say “That looks like magic to me.”

There’s no doubt in my mind that my dad is intelligent. Quite visibly so. But intelligence is relative depending on your location and what is happening. This is apparent in many stories just after the New World is introduced. This is the part where your hero encounters a whole world of possibility he never knew and isn’t prepared for. Imagine sending Sherlock through a portal to Middle Earth. What use would his specialized intelligence be there?

Often, intelligence is an overarching trait. It is an ability that helps your character to adapt to, learn from, and thrive in new situations. I can’t see Sherlock taking very long to figure out the new world and how it works, because he’s smart.

This point also applies to characters who are being compared to other characters. Dr. Watson is a prime example. He’s intelligent – as a doctor, he pretty much has to be – but next to Sherlock, his intellect pales. He is intelligent in a different area, and since his area is not the one being focused on, he usually only acts as a foil for Sherlock – someone on the level of the audience who is just as lost as we are.

This is another tactic commonly used for the introduction of the New World. If you have a character who is in some way equal to the audience enter the new setting, you can use him or her to explain things the other characters already know. Be careful to balance this, however, with your character’s already-existing specialty, so you don’t risk him looking stupid (something I’ve seen far too often.)

       2. Intelligence is dangerous.

Another somewhat unconventional example of intelligence is Haymitch. In this excerpt from Catching Fire, Katniss and Peeta ponder how Haymitch, whom they know as a crotchety drunkard, became a victor in the Hunger Games.

            Finally Peeta says, “That force field at the bottom of the cliff, it was like the one on the roof of the Training Center. The one that throws you back if you try to jump off and commit suicide. Haymitch found a way to turn it into a weapon.”

            “Not just against the other tributes, but the Capitol, too,” I say. “You know they didn’t expect that to happen. It wasn’t meant to be part of the arena. They never planned on anyone using it as a weapon… It’s almost as bad as us and the berries!”

It’s the same kind of intelligence that brought Katniss and Peeta out of the arena alive the first time. Quick adaptation to their position, then use of the available resources. And that’s part of what makes them so dangerous to the Capitol.

It’s not only the Powers That Be who are threatened by intelligence. The villains fear it too. A quick-thinking army captain with a small force can trounce, slow down, or harry a larger force with relative ease. A sharp commoner can cause trouble for the noblemen. And a brilliant detective can catch even the most furtive criminal. Fellow allies may be threatened as well - the intelligent character may make them feel incompetent, unimportant, or downright useless. Alienated allies are almost as dangerous as the baddies your hero is working to take down.

       3. Intelligence is exclusive.

The title of this point makes it sound like there’s some kind of club or something that no one can get into but exceptionally intelligent people. There’s a sense in which that’s true, but my real point is this: Intelligence excludes.

Think of how many intelligent people and characters you’ve heard of who are incredibly lonely. The artists, the geeks, the weirdos. The freaks. It also seems that the level of intelligence is relative to the level of exclusion. The ones who can pretend that they’re normal often pass themselves off as such, but the further up the scale you go, the harder it is to pretend.

            There was a boy called Eustace Clarence Scrubb, and he almost deserved it. His parents called him Eustace Clarence and masters called him Scrubb. I can’t tell you how his friends spoke to him, for he had none.

One of my favorite things about the movie The Voyage of the Dawn Treader is how smart Eustace is. He keeps beetles in jars and has the mindset of a lawyer and speaks with a remarkable vocabulary. He also has no friends, not unlike a certain detective we all know and love. There is one stark difference between Eustace’s story and Sherlock’s, however. Eustace gains friends because he changes; even though he’s still smart, he’s less arrogant and superior. Sherlock gains friends (or a friend, singular) not because he changes, but because John comes to see him for who he is.

I’d like to draw another example, from a couple of my own characters. Iri and Fairivel. Father and son. Both are very intelligent. They're about as different as they could be. Fairivel is the ruler of Laecla, land of the elves, and he is known to be a fair man, an excellent ruler, and a superb diplomat. Iri is restless, always chasing after what will excite him next, extremely charming, and uses people shamelessly to get what he wants. Both are using their intelligence in a different way, but both have distanced themselves with it. Neither of them have many, if any, people who genuinely care about them for who they are.

     4. Intelligence is blinding.

How could I write a post about intelligent characters without mentioning a few of their faults? The blinding aspect of the title is meant to apply to other players in the story - and to the character themselves.

Think of Watson when he first met Holmes. He couldn't stop complimenting Holmes on his genius. But that wears off pretty quickly and we, through John, start seeing some of Sherlock's faults. He's arrogant, has no idea how to behave around people, and lacks basic knowledge of the solar system, among other things.

Then there's how the intelligent character views himself, especially in relation to other people. With a superior view of themselves, they may treat ordinary people with impatience or even scorn. (For a more complete list of intelligent characters and their positives and negatives, refer to this post over at The Bookshelf Muse.)

There's a more complicated type, for which I'm going to use yet another Sherlock example. When we meet the villain of the first episode, he is a singularly disappointing middle-aged cabby. But as the writers expound on him, his personality, his methods, you forget his exterior. You begin to see the mind behind it. By the time the episode ended, I'd forgotten how disappointed I was that the villain turned out that way. I was utterly fascinated by the twists of his mind. His intelligence had blinded me.


5. Intelligence is underused.

Before I stopped reading dystopian and the like, a friend recommended an interesting little book called Variant. Beyond the mysterious plot and the intriguing setting (an experiment disguised as a walled school where, once the students were in, they never got out and had no contact with the outside world) I remember that the main character, Benson Fisher, set himself apart from other heroes in YA literature in my mind. Because he was smart.

            The whole time we sat there I kept an eye on the trees. There were Society kids out there. One was at the tree line, patrolling on the back of a four-wheeler. I could hear a second one, but couldn’t see it.

            What would make them act like that? Why wouldn’t they just make a break for it?

            As I watched them I thought about what they’d need to have to keep the four-wheelers running: gasoline, oil, tools. All of that could help my escape.

As soon as he learned what was happening, he did exactly what I would have done. He started plotting to escape. I connected firmly with him through the book. He tried to break the other students free of their lethargy. He never missed an opportunity to gather supplies and investigate the terrain for his escape. I wanted to cheer for him.

Benson also lacked another common element of fictional heroes. He had no clever mentor hovering over him, pointing out his every flaw. While this is an effective way to introduce the reader to the world (a tactic often linked with the one I mentioned in the first section) I wish I saw more characters who could interact with the mentor on their own terms.

I'm not sure why I perceive a severe lack of intelligent YA characters. Maybe it's a result of the watered-down literature of our day and age. Maybe no one wants to write an intelligent character because they're simply hard to write. But implementing an intelligent character doesn't mean you have to write a superhero. You just need to do your research.

(I also compiled a list of characters I wanted to use for examples, but didn't get to. Since I didn't want to waste it, here they are:

            Kieran from The Restorer’s Son by Sharon Hinck

            Temeraire from His Majesty’s Dragon by Naomi Novik

            Claire from Outlander by Diana Gabaldon

            Kelsier from Mistborn: The Final Empire by Brandon Sanderson)

So what about you? Who's your most intelligent character? Do you recognize or use any of the methods I've mentioned here? Do you have anything to add?

Setting: Ballroom

Hey there guys! Today I'm going to do something a little different, something I've not done before but have been wanting to do for a while. I'm sure most of you writers have heard of The Bookshelf Muse (and if you haven't go check it out - it's an amazing resource.) Over there, they have a Setting Thesaurus I've been using extensively. (See this post if you're wondering exactly what a Setting Thesaurus is and what it's for.) They have a ton of locations - some of the ones I use most frequently are woods at night, mountains, and medieval marketplace. But soon, those weren't enough for me. I wanted more - especially fantasy-tailored settings, since they have a few but not that many. So I started making my own.

This is a ballroom setting  I thought up last night, with some help from my friend Meaghan over at Within the Writer's Wardrobe.

SIGHT:
rich fabric, embroidery, jeweled shoes, ladies laughing, gloves on elegant hands, curls of elaborate hairdos, band or orchestra playing, chandelier, flickering candles around the room, food laid out elegantly on side tables, balcony, bottles of wine, flowers, moonlight through open windows, ornamental knives or swords at men's waists, bead-encrusted dresses, filigree on walls and ceiling, gold-trimmed dishes, whirls of movement, made-up faces, sparkling jewelry, plants real or fake, musicians swaying, rows of tables, elegantly presented food, trickling fountain, stone steps or staircases, couples flirting or kissing in corners, benches in out-of-the-way places to rest

SOUND:
drums, fiddles, violins, singing, people laughing and talking, clapping, feet tapping on the floor, skirts swishing, familiar rhythms of songs, one-two-three beat of a waltz, music thrumming through the walls, murmured words in your ear, pouring wine, trickling water from fountain, tinkling chimes or bells, blowing curtains, chewing, doors opening and closing, welcome speach by host/hostess, tuning instruments, scrape of chairs, clinking of beads, soft breeze through stifling room, nervous tittering laughter, flames guttering, melting wax, clink of wineglasses


SMELL:
sweat, perfume, herbs, food, soup, wine, soap, starchy clean fabric, night air from the windows, warm earthy stone, fresh fruit and vegetables, bread, steam from various dishes, meat, pie, pastries, smoke, water, dust, oiled leather, fur


TASTE:
hors d'ouvres, sweat trickling onto your lips, cool night air, expensive wine, cool water, fruit, punch, flaky pastries, spices

TOUCH:
skirts swishing against your legs, swaying to the music, hand of your partner on your waist, bumping shoulders with people, toes stamped on, belly aching from laughter or too much food, wiping lips daintily with napkin, mincing along in expensive clothes, leaning against wall or railing, clothes scratching skin, finger of cool air from windows, dry mouth, nervousness in your stomach, clammy hands, prick of pins in hair, brushing along railing or door handle, being elbowed, colliding with someone in the crowd, serving yourself from dainty dishes, holding a gloved hand to your mouth to cover a laugh or yawn, blinking tired eyes, bracelet/necklace/other jewelry cool against your skin, tired legs, bowing/curtsying, thin stem of a glass in your fingers

So what about you? Have you used any of these setting thesaurus entries, and if so, which is your favorite? Can you think of anything else to add to this list? And what fantasy-themed location should I visit next?

Describing People

A common problem I see in novels is the inability to describe a character so that I can envision them. It's easy enough to imagine and describe a tall, rugged Ranger or a tiny glowing pixie, but when up against the complexities of real people, many authors fall short. This is a collection of tips and tricks I've picked up and learned about describing characters.


Verbs
I once heard verbs described as the engines that drive a story, and this is very true. You have to be choosy when using verbs to describe a person, however. A string of whimsical verbs used to describe a serious character will only make him seem whimsical himself. I like to call verbs in description active description. Rather than using verbs to convey motion and actions, I use verbs to describe things that are usually still. Use carefully chosen verbs to describe physical attributes of the character; rather than "her hair was short" use "her hair swung jauntily at her cheekbones".

Swirling tattoos cover his arms, climbing up from the collar of his shirt to twist around his throat, the ends hidden by his tousled dark hair. I try not to look at him. He could make me happy. ~Bethany Griffin, Masque of the Red Death

Selective Adjectives and Adverbs

There's so much controversy over adjectives. You'd think this would be a simple topic, but the fact is, deciding how much of something is beneficial is almost never simple. You have to factor in the pros, the cons, the way beginners do it, the way the experts do it, and on top of all this is a hearty dollop of conviction that may or may not be misplaced. My personal opinion is that adjectives and adverbs are there to be used. Use them well and sparingly, but use them. I probably use far too many, but I'm still not sure how much that weakens my writing. Adjectives in a character description are almost unavoidable. Still, select them in the same way you would select verbs - spend enough time finding the right ones so that the description is tailored to the character. Another something I've learned is that you should almost never go with the first word that comes to mind. Your brain is lazy, and I can almost guarantee you that with a good thesaurus and a little time, you can find something better.

She's slight and tawny and smooth-skinned, like a nut. An inverted pyramid of hat frames a face effervescent with delight and her tattooed hands cradle a bit of green pulled from the damp Andean soil. Her simple clothes and mud-smudged body all cry I am plain, I am poor but that bright face cries otherwise. ~Me, written just now for this post

Word Choice
Think carefully about the impression you want to convey about the character you're describing. This goes hand in hand with Point of View or POV. Figure out how the POV character talks and thinks and their attitude toward the person being described. For instance, if they're angry at the person or something they're associated with, their view is going to be skewed. Then choose your words accordingly. Also, think about the POV character's level of education and his social class. This should be important in any part of a novel, but it features prominently in the way your POV charrie describes others. My advice for this: get yourself in character (wear a skirt or clutch a dagger if you must) and read it out loud, in your character's voice. Alone, of course.



Movement
Think about the shyest, quietest, sweetest person you've ever met. Think about how they move, how they hold themselves. Now think about another shy, quiet person, but this time they're grumpy and a bit rude. I bet they're much different in the way they walk, their posture, their facial expressions. Even within stereotypes, individual quirks can affect movement, however slightly. Incorporating these subtleties can give insight early on into your character's mood and personality. In the below example, even though there's a lot of motion around Corlath, the motions he makes himself hint that he is a king and will be treated like one.

Harry turned around in time to see the heavy door thrown violently open, so that its hinges protested; and out strode a man dressed in loose white robes, with a scarlet sash around his waist. Several more figures darted out in his wake, and collected around him where he paused on the verandah. He was the axis of a nervous wheel, moving his head slowly to examine the lesser people who turned around him and squeaked at him without daring to come too near...But there was a quivering in the air around him, like the heat haze over the desert, shed from his white sleeves, cast off by the shadows of his scarlet sash. Those who stood near him looked small and pale and vague, while this man was so bright he hurt the eyes.~Robin McKinley, The Blue Sword

Continuity
I think it's happened to all of us - you're reading along, and the author is describing a character. You're nodding, getting it so far, and then the author sticks a pair of lush sideburns on the skinny glasses-wearing nerd. What? you're thinking. Wasn't expecting that. While I think we all know the importance of avoiding stereotypes and cliches, stepping out of them too far can get you a confused blink or two or even than infamous "O.o" look. This also tends to happen with settings in fantasy novels, especially. They just get too weird to be believable, and ever after my image of the place or person is ruined. So when you think you've come up with an interesting twist to add to your barrel-shaped tavern owner or your slip of a violet-eyed girl, run it past some fellow writers too, and see if you get "that look".




Surroundings
Draw attention to the surroundings to reveal character physically by asking "How does the character fit in? How do they stand out?" Using contrast and unity, you can draw very handy parallels between the character and the people around them, the character and the setting, or the character and the emotional atmosphere. For instance, if you set your scene in a room full of throbbing music, flailing bodies, sparkling clothes and spinning light and you throw in a man in a black cloak lurking in the corner, you have an instant image and instant intrigue concerning the character and what he's doing there. Now imagine a fisherman, worn and leathery, his hair bleached by the sun and his clothes full of holes, hauling in rope on a wind-weathered dock. This character fits where he is. He's been shaped by his environment, and that makes a statement. If we can imagine the environment the character fits in, we can see the character. Can you guess which the below example is - contrast or unity?

We got to the dirt road, and there, fifty yards back toward the railroad and headed toward us, was a stalled automobile. While we were looking at it, a chunky little man in a neat, but dust-covered brown suit and a derby hat with the top dented in, crawled out from under it, took one look at us, and began yelling and waving his arms frantically.~Leonard K. Smith, Fourteen-Mile Hike

Comparisons

Metaphors and similes. We all know and love 'em. Similes are my favorites, but I'm going to lump them all together and call them "comparisons" for now. This can tie in to surroundings if you compare the character to items from the setting. For instance, if you have a pale-as-death sorceress in a meadow full of daisies, you could compare her face to the flowers. They're about as different as can be, but it's a strong image because of that. That said, please be careful with your metaphors. Create them with originality and sensibility in mind. Visit The Bookshelf Muse and browse through the colors, textures, and shapes thesauri for some metaphor examples. In the excerpt below, the book is largely about the sea, so the comparison of Kir's face to pearl and foam is yet another touch of that sea.

A ring on his finger held a stone that trembled with the same twilight shadows in his eyes. His brows were dark, slightly slanted over his eyes. The bones of his face made hollows and shadows that seemed, in spite of the hearty sunlight, as pale as pearl, as pale as foam. ~Patricia McKillip, The Changeling Sea

Gradual Reveal
This is a subtle and beautiful way to introduce a character without dumping a bucket of description on the reader. I find that a combination of this and other techniques often works best. Work in details gradually, through dialogue, actions, and word choice (especially word choice, since the fewer words you have, the more they have to count.) In the example below, no description is given of Grandpa Beebe, but I bet by the end of the excerpt you have a pretty clear picture of what he looks like.

Grandpa Beebe squinted at the sun. "It's nigh onto noontide," he said, "and your Grandma is having sixteen head to dinner tomorrow. We got to get back home to Chincoteague right smart quick! I promised to kill some turkeys for her." He sighed heavily. "Seems as if the devil is allus sittin' cross-legged of me."
But he made no move to go. Instead, he squatted down on the beach, muttering, "Don't see why she's got to parboil 'em today." Then he took off his boots and socks and dug his toes in the sand, like fiddler crabs scuttling for home.~Marguerite Henry, Misty of Chincoteague

So tell me. What techniques have you found and learned to introduce your characters?